capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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