he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
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