you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
