saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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