Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
We need to rekindle our bromance
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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