i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
