How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize