If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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