What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
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