you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
if only i could text you this smell
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
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