Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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