Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
The air was thick with penises
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
