So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Randomize
