Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
