Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
