I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
