problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
