idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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