I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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