so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
