the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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