I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Randomize
