The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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