We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
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I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
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Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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