Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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