Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
