Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
