batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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