Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
And then he peed in my hair
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