I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
