and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Are we in a gay sports bar?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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