try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize