once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
