I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
He did a backflip because drugs
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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