when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
