dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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