And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
