Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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