Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Randomize
