I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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