The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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