so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
