So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
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