sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
