just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
