Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
