We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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