I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
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