hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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