I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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