Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Randomize